It was a heavy burden on the conscience to know that while you sat in Music 101, some contemporary—as "worthy" of a college education as you were, but one who had been denied the opportunity because he was poor, or black, or both—was getting his head blown off in Vietnam. Many students believed that such inequity was wrong, but couldn't bring themselves to redress it personally by refusing the student deferment. It's a dreadful combination: to act for self-protection yet at the same time to loathe oneself for acting that way.