Quotation by S.J. Perelman

Why don't you go home to your wife? I'll tell you what. I'll go home to your wife and outside of the improvements, you'll never know the difference. Pull over to the side of the road there and let me see your marriage license.
S.J. Perelman, U.S. screenwriter, Bert Kalmar, Harry Ruby, and Norman Z. McLeod. Groucho Marx, Horsefeathers, a wisecrack made to Huxley College's outgoing president (1932).
Surprise me with a
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