Today's comedian has a cross to bear that he built himself. A comedian of the older generation did an "act" and he told the audien...ce, "This is my act." Today's comic is not doing an act. The audience assumes he's telling the truth. What is truth today may be a damn lie next week.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it ... try to fake three laughs in an hour--ha ha ha ha ha--they'll t...ake you away, man. You can't.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather rid...iculous, when you think about it.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
The reason I'm in this business, I assume all performers are--it's "Look at me, Ma!" It's acceptance, you know--"Look at me, Ma, l...ook at me, Ma, look at me, Ma." And if your mother watches, you'll show off till you're exhausted; but if your mother goes, Ptshew!LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
The thing with Catholicism, the same as all religions, is that it teaches what should be, which seems rather incorrect. This is "w...hat should be." Now, if you're taught to live up to a "what should be" that never existed--only an occult superstition, no proof of this "should be"Mthen you can sit on a jury and indict easily, you can cast the first stone, you can burn Adolf Eichmann, like that!LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
All my humor is based upon destruction and despair. If the whole world were tranquil, without disease and violence, I'd be standin...g on the breadline right in back of J. Edgar Hoover.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
A lot of people say to me, "Why did you kill Christ?" "I dunno ... it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know." We kil...led him because he didn't want to become a doctor, that's why we killed him.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
Now a Jew, in the dictionary, is one who is descended from the ancient tribes of Judea, or one who is regarded as descended from t...hat tribe. That's what it says in the dictionary; but you and I know what a Jew is--One Who Killed Our Lord.... And although there should be a statute of limitations for that crime, it seems that those who neither have the actions nor the gait of Christians, pagan or not, will bust us out, unrelenting dues, for another deuce.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »