Children need both latitude of expression and firmly enforced limits on their behaviors, in a blend that results in calm, patient ...management. The key to success is to tailor the rearing environment to the developmental level of the child--what she or he can handle--and to individual differences among children.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
Normal children of both sexes and all cultures will follow a more or less standard and universal developmental pattern and timetab...le, and reach approximately the same level of development at maturity. While a particular culture's need and expectations and teaching will shape the course of development and affect adult capabilities to some degree, normal individuals, whatever their native culture, if transplanted and taught, could learn to meet the normal demands of their adapted cultures.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
They [parents] can help the children work out schedules for homework, play, and television that minimize the conflicts involved in... what to do first. They can offer moral support and encouragement to persist, to try again, to struggle for understanding and mastery. And they can share a child's pleasure in mastery and accomplishment. But they must not do the job for the children.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
My friend devotes himself to his life, whenever he can find the spare time. His motto is: 'Don't just sit there: live!' So he's to...o busy to stand, to walk, to do anything, except to live. He even refused to kiss a girl, when invited, on the grounds that it was time again to be living. Schedules are sacred to him.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
It no longer makes sense to speak of "feeding problems" or "sleep problems" or "negative behavior" is if they were distinct catego...ries, but to speak of "problems of development" and to search for the meaning of feeding and sleep disturbances or behavior disorders in the developmental phase which has produced them.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
There's one basic rule you should remember about development charts that will save you countless hours of worry.... The fact that ...a child passes through a particular developmental stage is always more important than the age of that child when he or she does it. In the long run, it really doesn't matter whether you learn to walk at ten months or fifteen months--as long as you learn how to walk.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
There is absolutely no evidence--developmental or otherwise--to support separating twins in school as a general policy. . . . The ...best policy seems to be no policy at all, which means that each year, you and your children need to decide what will work best for you.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
... when one reflects on the books one never has written, and never may, though their schedules lie in the beautiful chirography w...hich marks the inception of an unexpressed thought upon the pages of one's notebook, one is aware, of any given idea, that the chances are against its ever being offered to one's dearest readers.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
We often treat our children as though they are the first children in history to exhibit such terrible behavior. In our anger, we c...ommunicate to them that "good" children don't behave in those ways when in fact good children do. Instead of acknowledging that this is appropriate developmental behavior, we think our children are doing things deliberately to drive us crazy.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
In the East, it may be sufficiently symbolic to take an apartment three subway stops away from the family residence and proclaim i...ndependence. In the state of illusion and vast distances, establishing individuality may require leaving California. The young people of the East, rich and poor, are disciplined by the urban system in which they live. Trains have schedules. Buses stop at marked corners. Restaurants fill up at certain hours. Shops are open certain days, normally not on Sundays. California isn't like that. The young people of the West can almost shape their lives to suit, especially if they own a vehicle that can carry them anywhere at whim. California is home of the all-night market, Sunday shopping, and twenty-four-hour breakfasts in coffee shops. California is easy to rebel against because everything, including disaffection, is convenient. New York is not so easy.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »