The child knows only that he engages in play because it is enjoyable. He isn't aware of his need to play--a need which has its sou...rce in the pressure of unsolved problems. Nor does he know that his pleasure in playing comes from a deep sense of well-being that is the direct result of feeling in control of things, in contrast to the rest of his life, which is managed by his parents or other adults.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
To be told that our child's behavior is "normal" offers little solace when our feelings are badly hurt, or when we worry that his ...actions are harmful at the moment or may be injurious to his future. It does not help me as a parent nor lessen my worries when my child drives carelessly, even dangerously, if I am told that this is "normal" behavior for children of his age. I'd much prefer him to deviate from the norm and be a cautious driver!LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
Among the most valuable but least appreciated experiences parenthood can provide are the opportunities it offers for exploring, re...living, and resolving one's own childhood problems in the context of one's relation to one's child.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
Parents ought, through their own behavior and the values by which they live, to provide direction for their children. But they nee...d to rid themselves of the idea that there are surefire methods which, when well applied, will produce certain predictable results. Whatever we do with and for our children ought to flow from our understanding of and our feelings for the particular situation and the relation we wish to exist between us and our child.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
Most advice on child-rearing is sought in the hope that it will confirm our prior convictions. If the parent had wished to proceed... in a certain way but was made insecure by opposing opinions of neighbors, friends, or relatives, then it gives him great comfort to find his ideas seconded by an expert.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
As the creative adult needs to toy with ideas, the child, to form his ideas, needs toys--and plenty of leisure and scope to play w...ith them as he likes, and not just the way adults think proper. This is why he must be given this freedom for his play to be successful and truly serve him well.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
Fairy tales are loved by the child not because the imagery he finds in them conforms to what goes on within him, but because--desp...ite all the angry, anxious thoughts in his mind to which the fairy tale gives body and specific content--these stories always result in a happy outcome, which the child cannot imagine on his own.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
A child... who has learned from fairy stories to believe that what at first seemed a repulsive, threatening figure can magically c...hange into a most helpful friend is ready to believe that a strange child whom he meets and fears may also be changed from a menace into a desirable companion.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
psychologist It is through friendships that teenagers learn to take responsibility, provide support, and give their loyalty t...o non- family members. It is also in teenage friendships that young people find confidants with whom to share thoughts and feelings that they are not comfortable sharing with their parents. Such sharing becomes one of the elements of true intimacy, which will be established later.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »
Modern children were considerably less innocent than parents and the larger society supposed, and postmodern children are less com...petent than their parents and the society as a whole would like to believe. . . . The perception of childhood competence has shifted much of the responsibility for child protection and security from parents and society to children themselves.LESSATTRIBUTION DETAIL »